How Lizzie Lost Her Groove

      Right now it is really hard for me to stay in the swing of things. Life happened. Family got sick, other distractions got in the way and I found that my enthusiasm and time for working out waned. Most people say that the second week is the hardest. How true it is. Now is the time that I need the encouragement to keep going. My goal is to work out every day without fail but goals sometimes seem unreachable especially when life gets hard or hectic.

Conquering one thing at a time.

      I haven't been to the gym in two days and I am so guilt ridden about it. I have learned to work through the pain of working out but I must admit I am such a wimp when it comes to being sick. I couldn't bring myself to go workout with an upset stomach.
      I think I'm still probably doing good since I have not had a soda since last week and I've cut down on my sugar intake.... of course all I'm craving right now is a Coke, a big steak, and something decadently chocolate. I think my will-power will hold out but I would like to feel better that way in case I crack and have one of those things (or all three) I can go work it off.

3rd Time Is The Charm

      Today was the hardest day to make myself go to the gym. I didn't have work today and had no reason, other than a commitment I made to myself, to go to the gym. I woke up sore this morning and wanted nothing more than to stay in bed. Still I am really glad I did go. It was a bitter-sweet day. I worked through my pain today which made me feel accomplished but wore a heart rate monitor and realized once again how out of shape I am. I was within my zone for 5 minutes and then I started exercising and it didn't go within my zone after that.
      Next week will probably be a week when I need accountability and encouragement to make myself workout. My husband will be on a business trip and will not be here to remind me of my commitments to myself.

Daunting Preconceived Notions

      I started going to a gym to meet my goals. My first visit was yesterday. I went a little daunted and sceptical. It is very intimidating being a short, fat woman entering a gym for the first time.
      My first thoughts encompassed most of my insecurities. Will I be mocked because of my weight? Will I make a fool of myself? Will I look like a dork while using all the equipment wrong? Basically all the "What the heck did I get myself into" questions. My mind was put at ease almost from the moment I entered. I looked around and noticed there was more than just toothpick thin women there. There were women who were comparable in size to myself and not being ostracised by everyone else. Everyone looked relatively comfortable..except for what ever discomfort the workout was providing.
      Then I meet the floor coach. She was everything I was not expecting. She was very welcoming and comforting about all my fears. She took the time to show me how to use all the equipment correctly and make sure I would not be doing them wrong. Then as we talked she explained that she used to do everything wrong. The fact that this was a women-only gym also helped.
      Soon all the worries and first impressions were forgotten as the workout took over my thoughts. I was extremely impressed and extremely sore by then end of the session. There are times (a lot of them) that I forget that I am a woman who is 5'1" and 219 lbs. Life doesn't always bring to mind how out of shape and obese I am, but the gym reminded me of all that. I felt so energized when I left but during my workout I remember why I was doing this.
      I left the gym yesterday thinking "What have I gotten myself into" and today thinking "I'm going to enjoy this".

Take That Evil Doers

      I've realized recently that I have slipped complacently into a very lazy and chaotic life. I have not set any goals for myself and allowed myself to become everything I used to despise. A few months ago at my 28th party I realized the only thing I have accomplished is having a family. I have successfully raised two children, have managed to not killed them or allowed them to run with sharp objects. Actually my kids are my pride and joy, they remind me that I have accomplished something in life. They are well behaved children with a wild sense of adventure and odd, quirky humor.
      While watching Biggest Loser and complaining about my lack of goals and energy my husband suggested that I start blogging to keep a record of my goals and so that the few people who will read this keep me accountable for reaching my goals. Not being tech savvy by any means, my husband was nice enough to help me set up a blog (feel free to mock me).
      My goals are few and simple. By the end of the year I want to have lost alot of weight and alot of clutter. I know those goals sound extremely simple but anyone who has met me knows those are mountains to me. My organizational skills pertaining to weight and clutter are very much the same... I have none. I'm one of those people that you meet who are very happy but easily distracted. I have no attention span and lose my train of thought once I see shiny objects.
      Before having children I didn't have to exercise or watch what I ate. I could eat anything, not exercise, and stay a size five... then I had children. I wasn't used to having to watch what I ate or have to exercise and so I let myself go from a size 5 to a size 20. Shocking right? Can you imagine what I felt? I gave up after that... figured losing weight was impossible so I didn't even try. Now I have two energetic and adventurous children (ages 6 and 4) who I can't keep up with and I am so disappointed that I can't enjoy life to the fullest with them. My daughter is a very lovely girl who has the heart of an artist....she always is looking at life in respects to how she can draw it. She sees something and immediately wants paper and colors to draw what is going on in her mind. My son on the other hand is a lot like me (or how I used to be) very high energy, mischievous, and wants to grow up to be a super hero. He will, out of the blue, run down the hall, bound into the living room and with a very commanding voice yell "Take that evil doers". He also has a very short attention span.
      I often wish I could have some of the energy that they have.... they have so much to spare it wouldn't kill them to share a little. I wish I had more energy. Even the people on the Biggest Loser often quickly go from having no energy to walk on a treadmill to having the energy to run on them. That got me thinking why not be brutal when it comes to getting healthy, just like on Biggest Loser. Tackle nutrition and exercise with a "take no prisoners" attitude. I hope I can do this because tomorrow I have my first appointment at the gym. Tomorrow I will either die at the gym or it will give me energy. I'm praying it doesn't kill me. Tomorrow is my first day giving up sodas as well. I'm going head on against all my bad habits and screaming "Take that evil doers".